Who the fuck do I have to kill...

...to get this hot. Ciara. What the fuck. She doesn't even break a sweat. She just looks great in nothing but a fur coat, heels, and a $300 bathing suit. Not. Fair.

I'm the sweatiest....

Oh and this one too...

This is courtesy of Meagan. She says to look out for the talentless man who plays the bongos and is in every music video these guys make. Neat-o!

Also...

....I discovered this song after my playlist for June had been finalized. But expect it on the July mix.

I can't stop listening to this song. It's what I want the soundtrack to my Rooftop Beach Party to sound like. And I think they are singing about South Carolina? Which, even though it's not that cool....seems pretty rad to me. Because I want to go to the beach real bad.

I'm going to Martha's Vineyard for the 4th of July! This boat is a preview of my weekend. Enjoy!

Soundtrack for June

So, hello. June has been a funny month - it got really hot, I competed in a National Cheesemongers Competition (which is the dorkiest thing I can possibly think of), and I decided to move (where to in Brooklyn is still a mystery.)

For the past year, I have been making a monthly (well, sometimes about every 6 weeks) playlist. So, after a lot of really frustrating online research, I finally figured out how to upload the playlist to the internet and let all my friends listen in. It's one long file, so you can put it on and walk away and come back and still have it playing! Awesome! There will be more to come...

Narwhal Taco's June Playlist

Tracklist:

1.) "Does Not Suffice" - Joanna Newsom

2.) "Fist City" - Loretta Lynn

3.) "You're the One" - Paul Simon

4.) "Kerja Kami (Our Work)" - Dara Puspita

5.) "Everywhere" - Fleetwood Mac

6.) "Back to Life (However Do You Want Me) - Soul II Soul

7.) "Animal (Mark Ronson Remix) - Miike Snow

8.) "Chase Scene" - Broken Social Scene

9.) "All Around And Away We Go (Teen Daze Remix) - Twin Sister

10.) "Power (feat. Dwele)" - Kanye West

11.) "Run The Heart" - Sleighbells

12.) "Deadbeat Summer" - Neon Indian

13.) "Queen of the Night" - Whitney Houston

14.) "Peppergood" - The Samps

15.) "Why Don't You Love Me" - Beyoncé

16.) "aNYway" - Duck Sauce

17.) "I Am Not A Robot (Clock Opera Remix)" - Marina & The Diamonds

18.) "XXXO" - M.I.A.

19.) "Dancing On My Own" - Robyn

So it gets a little dancy towards the end. But it makes for really good WALKING music. Trust me....

Here are some music videos for you.

This music video is real good.

Having a moment.

So, it's Menswear Fashion Week for Spring 2011 in Milan right now. Ok, whatever, menswear is never as cool or exciting as regular fashion week, but I gotta take what I can. This year two fashion shows are sticking out in my mind. Not necessarily for the clothes at all.

First, let's take a look at Bottega Veneta.



WHERE DID THEY FIND THOSE MODELS. They are the best. Like...not too skinny...not too styled...kind of scruffy...pumpin' up the chest hair. Seriously. Way to get the styling right. Real men wearing real clothes. Yep.

Then, we look at Emporio Armani.







This is the gayest shit I've ever seen. "Oh, just going for a walk in my leather pants, hat, and backpack! Maybe I'll throw on my bondage-esque belly chain with my clam-digger leather pants! Nah. I'll just wear my singlet. Backwards. With man sandals. That'll be a good idea."

WHAT? This show is too much to watch. It's like they should have been pumping that weird disinfectant-bleachy smell that the bathrooms at sleazy gay bars always have into the fashion show. Great. Can't wait to see people wearing mesh blazers over their leather bondage singlets...

I miss California right now.

Sunday.

So don't get me wrong. I love Beach House. Their new album is really good - it's exciting that they got some time in a really good studio. But, I sometimes miss the old days when they sounded like two kids who were playing with a synthesizer in their living room in Baltimore.

She has a great voice and they have to be one of the most scruffily attractive duos ever.



Ok, so he kind of ruins it at the end when he starts talking. But....if you ignore dumb musician talk, it's pretty good.

Stevie.

This is so good.

Ok, so I'm going to post some more.

I thought you guys might like some pictures.

So I live in the "East Williamsburg" abyss where Williamsburg melts into Bushwick and it's basically a place where concrete and discount shoe stores go to die. Not my most favorite of neighborhoods, but the other day I was driving around and I discovered a beautiful church that is about 9 blocks from my house! It's on the other side of Woodhull Hospital - which looks less like a hospital and more like a chemical testing facility for the criminally insane. Sooo....I don't really go exploring around there too often. Seriously, Brooklyn. Can we get it together and make it look less like Darth Vader designed our medical facilities? Please.



Then I went home and made an egg.



Then I roast a chicken with these things.



Then things got atmospheric with Kitty.




Good day off.

Secret #1

I used to have a blog in high school.

It was basically a way for me to be as secretly gay as possible and make weird online blog friends with anonymous other loser gays like myself who were too busy trimming their bangs and adjusting their wrist bands and worrying about their Sims to actually talk to other real human beings.

But now I am back to the blogging world! Hooray!

Narwhal Tacos. Here it is. And since it took me 35 minutes to figure out how to adjust the title font, I guess this is going to be a slow endeavor. But, we'll start with a good video.



OMG! Look at that dress! I want.

That is Kitty Wells from a 1957 performance for the Grand Ole Opry. kEwL.